I pause today to remember a friend lost to cancer this past Friday, Jimmy McElroy, Xaverian High School class of 1981. I know you never met Jimmy, and I had.t seen him in over 20 years, but we all have a.Jimmy Ma. in our past, and even if we do.t see those people for a while, they are never far away in our memories. Thanks for taking the time to read and say a prayer for his family, as well as for the family of Kay Yow, who also lost her battle to cancer as we know on Saturday.
On Friday January 23 I was in Chicago for a series of meetings, and my cab driver from .Hare to downtown was a nameless, faceless man from Nigeri.he was one of the few cab drivers who I can ever remember speaking to at lengt. and frankly I do.t know what made me strike up a conversation with him. Maybe it was because the first thing he asked me when I got into his cab was.How was your fligh.? I dunno.
What I do know is that this man from Nigeri.immigrant, not yet a citizen, worked 16 hours a day driving a cab while his wife and three children were still in Lagos because LOVED Americ.?It is a land of opportunity unlike any other, and everyone who comes here or wants to come here LOVES what you have and what the possibilities ar.you can be whoever you want to be, and the possibilities are endless. he said, beaming while negotiating the traffic. We talked for almost an hour as, and after I left I felt that this man, whose name I never learne.he never asked me min.GOT IT. He understood the old-school American ideal that many had forgotten but so many used to embrace not so long ago. Despite the hard times, and they are.t really that hard, we will be able to figure it out like those before us and like we have before. He inspired me.
Later that day, sitting in another cab, going to another meeting, my blackberry buzzed, and I was saddened to read the message from a high school friend, Mike Carron. Jimmy McElro.James Francis Xavier McElroy, Xaverian High School class of 1981, veteran of so many early morning hours on the B9 bus across Brooklyn, fan of John Lennon and Elvis Costello, son of hard working Marine Park and Good Sheppard parents, and one of the touchstones of my life even though we had.t spoken in almost 25 years, had finally lost a long rumored and recently confirmed battle to cancer. One of my great high school friends, .m sure a great dad, a super husband, a hard working colleague and a great sports and music fan, was gone.
In a strange twist of irony, I had already thought about Jimm.s passing for a whil.I read in our church bulletin two weeks ago of the passing of a James McElro.same name but advanced past the age of 88, and was pleasantly surprised at the time, that our Jimmy Mac was still here fighting. I thought maybe we would have a repriev. that God had taken enough Jimmy McElro.s for one month. Unfortunately as my vibrating blackberry told me, God needed to call home one more.
Now how does an unnamed Nigerian immigrant link to a friend I had.t seen for over 20 year. Easy. Jimm.s persona was always one of endless dreams and potential. We spent SO many hours talking about.stuf. in the cafeteria, in home room and on the B9 in those early hours that the world was full of possibilitie.just like my Nigerian friend. Everything was possible if we were willing to try, and we knew somehow that those around us.those friends who even though we may not see or have as part of the everyday fabric of our lives, would always be.ther. to support us as we faced lif.s challenges, if needed. Just like my Nigerian friend who left his family and friends in Lagos. The belief in moving forward always motivated us, and moved us with a silent and unseen hand through the valleys and over the peaks that life has in store.
A few years ago we had a 20th anniversary of my eighth grade graduating class at Our Lady Help of Christian.and I was hoping that my friend Jimmy, who I do.t think I had seen or spoken to since shortly after our Xaverian graduatio.would accompany his OLHC bride Mary McManus, to the reunion. Even though we had 77 of 88 graduates show, the McElroy/McManus pair never responded. Hey, we all understand how busy we get with kids and jobs and crap with life in general, so there were no worries when we did.t hear back. I made a mental note to try and see if Mary could get me Jimm.s email so we could catch up. Of course as we know in the real world that connection never happened and my friend Jimmy slipped to God without ever connecting. I never found out for sure what a great dad, and husband and colleague and neighbor he wa.if he ever conveyed the pain and passion he had for John Lennon to his kids or newer friends (we were on the bus to Xaverian when we learned about Lenno.s death the early morning afte.it did.t affect me like it did him or our classmate Jimmy Conley, both more acute in their musical tastes at the time) or if he ever told his kids about his passion for St. Francis College hoops or for Cadets baseball or for his interest in the edgy (at the time) Elvis Costello. I never found out if he did, but I had a feeling that they knew, and probably knew the same Jimmy Mac at 44 in spirit and in soul that he was at 17.
So like so many in our mid.4.s, we are left with what ifs and why no.s, we mourn, we regret the passage of time, we pause and pay our respects and reminisce and then we get back to our oh-so-busy lives. We are going to try to get some of our homeroom together for a few drinks soon, but how many will show or remains to be seen. Even as we try as we might to usually look left and right, the view of wha.s directly ahead still draws the focus.
However what I can safely say is on one Friday the zeal of a man I had never met befor.that cab drive.and the passion of a man I knew 25 years ag.gave me a great chance to pause and say a prayer and give thanks for what we have, what we had in the past and probably most importantly, what can still be in the future.
To my new Nigerian.friend. thanks for the reminder, and to Jimmy Mac, thanks for being such a good friend back in the day. Your physical paths may never cross, but your passion will always be there for me. Thank you and God Bless those around you for the gifts you have brought.
