Friday night I was taking a few minutes channel surfing when I came upon James Brooks’ award winning iconic film “Terms of Endearment.” The story of a dysfunctional but very human family has a laundry list of stars then and soon to be, and remains a classic. However one thing struck me in the few minutes I was watching. It was during a birthday scene where Aurora Greenway (played by Shirley McLain) is in the midst of a birthday party with her suitors (one of which was Danny DeVito). Aurora is so transfixed on her age, she immediately runs next door to set up a long overdue lunch with playboy astronaut Garrett Breedlove (played by Jack Nicholson). Their genteel lunch the next day, doesn’t play out as scheduled, with some amazing scenes and dialogue, but the lessons the stately Aurora’s tries to teach Garrett are about being and acting grownup.
Why is this unusual. Aurora was only 52, making her two years younger than I am as I write this. Now maybe “age” means different things now that it did when the film was released in 1983, but to think of an active person of 52, at least many people I know, dressing for lunch and worrying about a quiet life of retirement, vs. a life where the best is yet to come, was both alarming and refreshing.
I say this now because of the meanderings experienced and people encountered in just the last 10 days, a stretch of discovery, events, learning and fun that has been quite amazing, and will be continuing on until I finish class at Columbia with our high school students at the beginning of August.
Last 10 days we have had the birth of a first grandniece, Grace, we have celebrated the 100th birthday in Baltimore of my great Aunt Sandra Crisalli, have attended numerous events in and around the city, watched one World Cup launch while we welcome one coming to North America in 2026, have gone through week one of an amazing class of young people with the School of the New York Times, and even witnessed the hatching of a hawk in a nest on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, hard by Grant’s Tomb.
Oh and today is my wife Laura’s birthday, and Sunday we will attend a wedding of one of our Columbia students, Maurice Eisenman. All about the people and places, vs. the things. Now the thought from those people and places, and the lessons learned, have again been phenomenal.
For example, Tuesday night at Players Tribune our NYVC Sports group hosted a solid discussion on media with two key influencers in the media landscape, John Skipper (now Executive Chairman of PERFORM Group after leaving as President of ESPN last year) and John Kosner (now running his own consulting firm after a long time helping shape the vision of ESPN in various senior roles, including EVP of Print and Digital Media). While their 30 minute dialogue was about where elements of media like rights,
“Rights are the most valuable asset in all of media. They will not go down.”
streaming
“We (PERFORM) will become the world’s biggest disruptor.”
and sports gambling
“My friends who are handicappers have never been busier. But it’s going to take time to see how this works out and who will succeed.”
will be going, it was a statement by Kosner to get things started for the packed room that really put things in perspective, and served as a great reminder to all that we are in a very fluid society no matter what the age, and we need to find ways to move forward and lean in, and sit back.
“Change is afoot. We need to embrace change and learn from it.”
Often we get caught up in the day to day and miss the opportunity to look not just forward but around us, and find little ways to appreciate and enjoy the ride we are on. This time of year as so many go through life altering events; positive ones like graduations, and tough ones like job changes, we sometimes miss the moments as they happen.
Ironically last Sunday, we visited the American Visionary Art Museum in Baltimore, and the walls were adorned with little sayings that reflected just that, the ability to embrace the moment, understand that change and enjoy the ride and those that you are with; a great little phrase we found was this one.
A great summary, no?
We always talk about the value of listening as a learning tool as well. While on the road this week I came across a new one from the artist Ben Rector called “Drive.” (take a listen) Yes a little too poppy for some, but he captured so much about the ride we should be on, including saying over and over again…
“Growing up doesn’t mean getting older.”
True dat.
So whether it has been a family event, the birth of a hawk, the learnings from young people in class or senior execs at a conference, the ability to keep growing and enjoying has never been better. “Terms” was a great film, with amazing storytelling, but casting Aurora at 52 today? No way.
She would have missed the ride. Don’t you.
