It has been quite a roller coaster first month of the year.
Bookending the 1st month of January 2020 are the sudden tragic losses of David Stern and Kobe Bryant (as well as the others who perished tragically Sunday) ; two at different stages of vibrant lives whose impact went and will go on, way beyond an orange ball. In between we also lost another basketball legend in Morgan Wooten and another stalwart, albeit a local one to me and the Fordham community, in Joe Kraemer Sr.
Other than a love of the round orange ball, all four, from a global scale to a hyper local one, had some key characteristics which for me show what we should be valuing again in a time when loud shouting and seem the rule. Some quick thoughts on the connections
Family: While we like to refer to big, unruly organizations, leagues and teams as “family,” the reality is that the family that matters most, and sometimes is the most forgotten, is the one that makes us who we are from first day to last breath. All four of these men put family…especially their kids…as the centerpoint of their lives… my cousin and colleague Jason Mollica offered up below on the why family first is so important…however he also opened another door which is equally important and I believe all four also valued; the ability to not just “hug your kids” in times of tragedy, but to find ways to do the right things to help them do the right thing…all the time…it’s up to us to show the way…
My thoughts on Kobe’s death mean very little. I’ve never been a Lakers’ fan, but obviously followed Mamba during my time in news and sports broadcasting. None of that matters now. The outpouring from those who were impacted by him, either directly or indirectly, is remarkable. I found myself thinking on Sunday night that my daughter is the same age as Kobe’s was. What am I doing to make her world (and my son’s) better? What am I doing to provide them the guidance they need to be good human beings? We are here for a short time. Life is incredibly precious. Do something each day, no matter how small, to impact this world in a positive way.
Teaching and Coaching: We need to be both teachers and coaches; not just in sports but in life. It’s not easy to lead by example and aspire to be higher, but all four men clearly held the teaching, and the coaching, aspect of their lives in very high regard from both their actions and their examples.
The other important aspect of teaching is being able to learn from mistakes, and to keep growing. All the words, the video, around the three big names lost in January referred to teachable moments and being able to move forward off of a loss, no matter how big or small. Well Joe Kraemer did the same; his life, like all of ours, had its share of ups and downs, but he never dwelled either. It doesn’t matter the size of the stage, it matters the character of the person and how you rebound from the setbacks we have every day. We need to keep learning, and all of these individuals never lost the curiosity of learning; no matter what the age, it kept growing.
Listening: Again all four were great storytellers. However what also shone through was their ability to listen in all aspects of their lives. Now that’s not to say these pretty headstrong people always liked what they heard or didn’t make their own choices; but they all wanted to take the time to listen to those around them .
Community and Cause: Maybe it is tied to faith; you had three Catholics and a Jew; but all had a deep ties to faith, and aspiring to help others through service. I don’t think any really shouted religion, but their ties to helping others, be they Sisters of Charity on Long Beach Island, New Jersey, the homeless, or others, the ability to impact on any level was another key driving force.
Storytelling: The impact of emotive storytelling was also not lost on any of these people. Whether it was via text or social media, or the old fashioned way sitting around a bar or a coffee table, all knew how to convey messages, empower others and build relationships through the power of storytelling. We are in a world where social interaction is put by the wayside, but these core four, knew and used the value of telling stories big and small to all around them. There was not a need for all to be the loudest voices all the time, but they all knew how important stories were to move the needle, and they used that powerful tool to grow community no matter where they were.
Now I knew David Stern later in life, Kobe Bryant more when he was just getting started, and Joe Kraemer throughout various stops over the past 35 years. Morgan Wooten I met once, but I knew through many friends and colleagues the impact he had on people, and his passing fits this narrative of the past 28 days all too well.
I also believe that all four are together in a better place today, connected not just by their love of basketball, but by their impact in changing the lives of those around them. It didn’t matter how big a spotlight they had, and three of them has massive spotlights in their own ways. What mattered was they took the time to catch a moment, enjoy a moment, and share a moment with those around them.
Although all are gone this month, each will have a divine legacy that will be positive and ongoing in those still here. They serve as great reminders through the lives they lived that it is our responsibility to keep things moving forward and doing all the little things that add up to making a big difference. By the way watch James Brown’s eulogy of Coach Wooten here.
Four lives; one beautiful focus, all to be missed.
