There we were at the NBA Draft Thursday night, the next stop in a journey for a handful of elite athletes, many of whom had spent most of their lives in the “all on” era of today, where everyone with a cell phone is “the media,” capturing their every moment.
On recent years the Draft and many events like it have become a circus for self-promotion, bling and for entourages big and small to grab a very big slice of the spotlight. While this year was not that different, there was one series of moments that became really pivotal, and in storytelling and character building, showed a human side that is becoming more and more part of the DNA of the modern athlete.
Each of the first four picks in the Draft, starting with Zion Williamson, all hugged a family member not just for a fleeting second, but for minutes…and cried. The realization of the moment was not lost in high fives and loud shouting; it was a cathartic wave of emotions that played out unabashedly and proudly for the world to see.
It was a series of moments that are as authentic as one could get, and gave all a look into the soul and the character of some young men who have worked hard and have dealt with pressure to succeed beyond what most of us will ever know, and it all came tumbling out.
In past years that flow of emotions would have been met with massive mimicry, but not really this year, and it is a sign, a positive one, where not just elite athletes, but young people in general, are finding it not just OK, but important to show and share emotion as a way to release stress and pressure.
We have said this before, but the issues of the mental stress and anxiety that young people are dealing with today; be it peer driven, sibling driven, parent or guardian driven, mentor or coach driven, or self driven, is at a breaking point. This recent L.A. Times story about teenage suicide is a must read, and in recent weeks we have seen a classmate of my son at Drexel take his life, while the AVP has had to deal and cope with the suicide of 25 year old rising star Eric Zaun. It is a crisis that we as a society need to deal with, and it certainly is not going away.
But what does this have to do with NBA Draft picks breaking down in the arms of the fathers and mothers? Lots. As we have seen with elite athletes like Michael Phelps and Kevin Love and many others, the issue of talking about mental stress and anxiety and finding key release points is on the rise. The acceptance of being human, even amongst those in a massive spotlight, is so key to our existence no matter who we are, and finding ways to release that stress and deal with the pressure for these athletes who are role models and have the ability to invoke change by their massive, and even niche, following, is going to be key for widespread acceptance of dealing with mental health issues. Millions aspire to be like superstar athletes, and if they show their humanity, that “pebble in a pond” can trickle down and maybe show many of those who aspire to be like them that it’s OK to release the stress as well.
Aspiration becomes inspiration, in a little bit of a different way than in the past.
While there are some that still say showing emotion gives an opponent an edge and is a sign of weakness, that feeling is changing. Some also say that we are pampering young people too much, and that even elite athletes are getting too much of an excuse to fail. Really? Luckily that audience seems to be shrinking, ironically, as the mental health issues and the suicide rate not just of teens but of many gifted young people keeps rising, and it has to stop.
Our colleague Terry Lyons, who has a unique seat near history through his career at the NBA and now as both a parent and an entrepreneur, had a great perspective on the show of emotion, and its evolution around two great hoopsters…
“Whether it’s the mentally toughest athlete in sports history, the great Michael Jordan, watching a career retrospective video at his Basketball Hall of Fame induction or a rookie draft choice having his name announced as the first pick of the 2019 NBA Draft (Zion Williamson), the sheer emotion of the moment takes over. It cannot be avoided. They cannot prepare.
It’s interesting in the fact in that those two momentous events are book-ends to an ultra-successful Hall of Fame career. As PR people, we’d sit with the rookies and let them know we’d hand them a roster of the team they were drafted by, stating the emotion will take-over and they won’t be able to think straight. The players would laugh and said they know the teams and the rosters by heart. Then, we’d see their knees shaking and the tears streaming, especially as they looked and hugged their parents and family members. They were glad to have the team roster, as a cheat-sheet.
At the Hall, for MJ, I remember briefing him as he did the final few frames of his family pictures and he looked at me like I was from another planet. Who was I to warn the great Michael Jordan about the emotional jolt he was about to take, about mental toughness? He dismissed the notion, stating if he “did” cry, he’d just say “Thank-you” and walk off.
Then, the video played, and he gradually lost it, tears streaming as his basketball life flashed in front of his eyes with his family alongside of him. Rock solid support in every direction. A standing ovation that had to mean more to him than all the others put together. It was from his peers.
He began his speech, ‘I told all my friends, I was just going to come up here, say Thank-you and walk off. I can’t. I’ve got so many people I want to thank. In all the videos, you didn’t just see me. … You saw Scottie Pippen… He gathered himself, and then MJ went on to deliver the greatest Hall of Fame induction speech in the history of sport. Tears still streaming. Mental toughness.”
On the positive side, we are seeing more and more teams and Universities taking the mental training and health side of the business as seriously as the physical side. Meditation and quiet reflection periods are becoming more and more the practice, and coaches, the best of whom are also teachers, are adjusting styles and philosophies to keep the grit and the competitive fire while also balancing the tremendous pressure coming from within around the elite.There is also a great site building a community to learn more about all these issues, called We’re All A Little Crazy. It’s worth checking out.
In an interesting listen recently, I heard author Dov Seidman, who preaches the need for compassion and mindfulness in the workplace and has worked with some NFL teams on balance, remarked that successful coaches today, even Super Bowl champions, are ones who have changed styles to relate to an athlete today whose completeness is being shaped and can’t be driven just by success on the field. He remarked that most of the recent Super Bowl winning coaches (taking Bill Belichick in his own prism) are leaders like Tom Coughlin, Mike Tomlin, Pete Carroll, Tony Dungy, Sean Payton and Doug Pederson, who have found ways to inspire, LISTEN and lead rather than the one size fits all of coaches past.
All of that is encouraging and positive and is just the tip of the iceberg in a trend that will help reverse a course that is both disturbing and dangerous for anyone; the pressure from within driving one to extremes.
Now this is not to say we will see athletes underperforming or taking the time away so as not to get their job done. RJ Barrett and Zion Williamson will be as driven from within as anyone in any field to succeed. However combing that drive with humanity makes for a great picture, something which we never always saw in the public eye. Maybe sometimes it’s too much for some to share, but for those who share, even on Draft Night, those pictures and actions are a positive message to millions, and that’s a good thing for all.
